Both processes are similar. They’re voluntary. You and your spouse/partner must jointly agree to participate. They’re private and occur outside of court. You and your spouse/partner are in charge of all decision-making, not the court, mediators, collaborative lawyers or neutral professionals.

The major difference between the two processes is support. If you and your spouse/partner work well together and are comfortable dealing with your issues without too much outside expertise, mediation probably provides the right amount of support for you. If you and your spouse want more support, collaborative law’s team approach—including collaborative lawyers and neutral professionals in fields like finance and psychology— is probably best for you.

Maybe there’s some mixture of these processes and others that would meet your family’s needs even better. Mediation and collaborative law can still help. Recall, these are flexible processes and that you’re in charge and can create whatever process best serves your family’s unique needs.

Yes. You and your spouse/partner can be successful in mediation regardless of how you feel about one another. Feelings of anger, sadness, guilt, shame and even relief are normal. If you and your spouse/partner are like most parties, there’s no reason you can’t manage your feelings and act in a business-like manner to achieve the best possible outcome for your family. If you need support, talking to a therapist or counselor is better and more cost-effective than working through these issues in mediation.

Yes. RL provides mediation services online via Zoom and in-person at our office in Canby, Oregon. In-person services are subject to masking recommendations by the Centers for Disease Control and the Oregon Health Authority.

No. “Shuttle mediation” is a great way to participate in mediation without face-to-face contact. The process proceeds as follows: you and your spouse/partner each have your own mediation room. As the name implies, the mediator shuttles between the two rooms and has private meetings, called “caucuses,” with each of you. The mediation proceeds in much the same way as in-person mediation except the mediator serves as each party’s mouthpiece. The entire mediation can be conducted this way, although, it’s usually best to have a couple of in-person meetings. Sometimes there are breakthroughs that can only happen face-to face.

Mediation may not be appropriate for you and your spouse/partner if there’s:

(1) a history of domestic violence

(2) a significant power imbalance

(3) a lack of trust concerning disclosure of vital information

(4) an inability to constructively or respectfully communicate on the part of either party

Also, if you or your spouse/partner want legal counsel and advice at every turn, you’d probably be better served by collaborative law or litigation.

Yes. While you and your spouse/partner may not have the financial know-how to handle these matters on your own, mediation’s flexible structure allows you to bring in financial experts for additional assistance. Both you and your spouse/partner must agree to their participation and pay all necessary fees.

Rickett Law’s (RL) mediator, Cathi Rickett, is a lawyer-mediator, meaning she graduated from law school and is an active member of the Oregon State Bar. This background, combined with expertise in mediation, uniquely benefits your family. Cathi is an experienced negotiator. Negotiation is at the core of mediation. She also possesses analytical skills to help parties identify issues and create options for mutual gain. If parties are interested in using objective criteria to evaluate options, she can share legal information, not legal advice. Legal information is distinguishable from legal advice in that it provides general information. Whereas, legal advice provides specific information to meet a party’s particular legal objectives. Lastly, Cathi is accustomed to conflict, thanks to her work as a public defender and family law attorney. There’s nothing you can say or do that will shock Cathi. She does her best to be neutral and nonjudgmental in all things. So, feel free to be honest about all issues that significantly impact your matter.

No. RL’s lawyer-mediator, Cathi Rickett, provides neutral and impartial facilitation, not advice and advocacy. That said, if requested by both parties, Cathi may offer legal information. Legal information is distinguishable from legal advice in that it provides general information. Whereas, legal advice provides specific information to meet a party’s particular legal objectives.

If you and your spouse/partner agree to mediate your matters, both of you must agree, in writing, to the rules of confidentiality and privilege. Confidentiality means mediation communications are not disclosed. Privilege means confidential communications can’t be offered into evidence if your matter ends up in court. Your mediator cannot testify in court. Also, if you have claims against your mediator, these rules may limit their liability.

No. If you and your spouse/partner reach a mutually satisfactory settlement agreement on all issues, you typically don’t have to appear in court.

RL recommends that you and your spouse/partner seek independent legal advice. This doesn’t have to cost an arm and leg. Many family law attorneys provide consultation on a limited basis for this very purpose.

Child welfare experts agree that parental conflict is harmful to children. Litigation by its very nature is high conflict. Mediation, however, is a peacemaking process. Some say it can even be transformative. You and your spouse/partner will probably be better co-parents as a result of mediation.

No. Although mediation can be incidentally therapeutic, it’s not a therapeutic process. Mediation may help you and your spouse/partner improve communication or your co-parenting relationship. But this isn’t the goal of mediation. Instead, its goal is to help you and your spouse/partner reach a mutually acceptable divorce or family reorganization agreement.

You and your spouse/partner may avail yourselves of RL packages. You will save even more money by preparing appropriately. Come to the table with a willingness to work together and an openness to a variety of options to resolve disputes. Promptly do your homework. You’ll be asked to gather information and complete questionnaires and forms. Lastly, be conscious of your time with your lawyer-mediator and in work sessions.

If you have children, you’ll be required to complete a parenting class before the court will finalize your settlement agreement. Classes are offered by state-approved providers at nominal cost.

As to the agreement itself, your mediator, consulting attorney, or service provider will prepare and file all necessary paperwork with the court. The court will review the paperwork for fairness. The settlement agreement contained therein will in all likelihood be readily approved. The terms of the agreement become final and legally enforceable upon the court’s signature

The odds are that you and your spouse/partner will be successful. Over 80% of all mediated matters reach a mutually acceptable settlement agreement that’s readily approved by the court. Even if you and your spouse/partner don’t get there, you’ve likely reached agreement on some issues that can be carried forward to the next process, which is usually litigation or arbitration.